I call myself fat instead of other words like ample, bearish, beefy, big, bosomy, built, bulky, burley, butterball, buxom, bigger body, chubby, chunky, comely, corpulent, curvaceous, curvesome, curvy, filled, flabby, fleshy, fluffy, full, full-figured, heavy, heavyset, hefty, husky, pleasing, plump, pogey, portly, pudgy, roly-polly, rotund, round, shapely, statuesque, stocky, stubby, substantial, think body, thick set, tubby, weighty, well-developed, well-formed, well-proportioned, well-rounded, zaftig.
So the reason why I use the word fat to describe myself and not any one of these other words is for three reasons.
I am reclaiming the word that has been used against me
First one, is I am reclaiming the word that has been used against me in the past that has caused me pain. Because I have taken it for my own, reclaimed it, and made it this wonderful thing, no one can ever use that against me. And any of those other words too. I don't give a shit.
It's a neutral descriptor
The second is really, it's a neutral descriptor like I have blond hair with little bits of pink in it right now. I don't know if you can see that. I have green eyes. I wear glasses. I'm five foot seven tall. I am fat. As soon as you embrace it as a neutral descriptor, it loses its power.
Three, it's accurate. I am fat, right? I used to think that I could hide my fatness, and when I'd say, "Oh, I'm fat." people would be like, "No! You're not. You're not fat." And I'm like, "Oh, yeah. Maybe they haven't noticed that I'm fat." But I am fat. I'm covered in fat, and it's gorgeous. And some people have more fat. Some people have less fat, but it's accurate.
It is political
And another reason is that it is political. By using the word fat in our vocabulary as a neutral word, we're telling other people that it's okay to be fat. And I'm proud to be fat. And maybe you shouldn't be stressed out about being fat or becoming fat or trying to be less fat because it's not actually this horrific thing that people say it is.
The more we say it and use it in our vocabulary, the less shocking it's going to be. I started my TEDx talk with the line, "Hello. I am fat." And for a lot of people, this is really shocking. To me, it wasn't. I'm just describing, "Hello. My name's Victoria" sort of thing. Some people are like, "Oh, my God. What are we going to do with that?" Like, "Do we have to tell her, 'No. You're not fat. Well, you know ...'" It's like when people say, "You're not fat. You're beautiful." And it's like, "Bitch. I'm pretty sure I'm both."
One thing to note is that I have claimed the word fat for myself. So if you said, "Hey, Victoria, you are fat. Hey, fatty. Hey, fierce fatty." I'm going to be like, "Yes, bitch. That's me." Whereas other fat people might not have claimed that word for themselves. And so I'd advise not to necessarily go around and see someone on the street and be like, "Hey, fatty. How you doing, girl?" Because they might be like, "What the fuck?" So if you know someone who's claimed as a positive descriptor of themselves, as a neutral descriptor, then go ahead, call them fat.
And as well, you can use the word fat in conversations and so say if you're describing something. So here's an example, Beyonce had some fat dancers in her Coachella set. And I actually got a lot of heat on my Instagram account from people saying, "You can't say that. How dare you. They're not fat. They're curvy. They're fluffy. They're voluptuous," etc., etc. That was a great moment for me to say, "Why? What's wrong with being fat?" And yeah, they might have been a smaller fat, but what's going on here? "Do you think that fat doesn't mean that they can dance, that they're not athletes. They don't have the stamina to perform in this epic two-hour performance?" Because that's not true.
So if you describe someone who's fat, and someone says, "Don't say that. That's not very nice." You can say, "Why? What's wrong with being fat?" And then watch them squirm. And then they'll say, "Well, it's better to say something like curvy or fluffy or chunky or whatever." Say, "Why? There's nothing wrong with the word fat. And there's nothing wrong with being fat." And see where that leads.
If you'd like more content like this, then head on over to the link below where I have my free e-course, Extreme Confidence Makeover. It's 10 days. It's free. It's online. It's amazing. Check it out. And I'll see you next time, Queen.
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Transcript available on the blog: https://bampowlife.com/blog/